How to know if a friend loves you

How to know if a friend loves you

Last updated on June 16, 2022 by Michelle Devani

Are you wondering whether your best friend is in love with you?

Perhaps you want to make a move on him, but you’re unsure whether he will reciprocate. 

Maybe you want to remain friends and you’re worried about him coming on too strong. 

Either way, this guide will help you. It reveals 28 signs that your best friend is in love with you.

However, before we explore these 28 signs, here’s a story that might interest you. 

Recently, I discovered a useful online tool that can track other people’s communications. 

This online communications tracker can reveal a lot of information about the people closest to you. And it’s completely discreet so you don’t need to worry about them finding out they’ve been tracked. 

You just need a few of the basic personal details to get started. 

Once you’ve input these details into the device, it can generate a wealth of data about their recent communications. 

You’ll find out who they’ve been calling and texting, what online services they’re using, what apps they’ve downloaded and more. 

In most cases, this tool could reveal a lot about your best friend’s feelings. Maybe you’ll discover he’s actually been spending a lot of time messaging other women. 

This is one of the clearest signs that he’s happy just being your friend. 

You can read on for my list of signs that he wants something more.

Is My Best Friend In Love With Me?

The thoughts and emotions you are feeling can be quite overwhelming. If you think you are in love with your best friend, this could be an opportunity to turn your friendship into a romantic relationship, but how do you begin to turn things around and address this with him? It can be confusing, I know.

If you read about the signs your best friend is in love with you, you may discover that he is, in fact, madly in love with you. Have you noticed him acting differently around you? Are you hoping he is in love with you, or do you not feel the same about him? 

These are tough questions to answer. I do understand that, but if you want to get to the bottom of the issue, you must face them. It’s difficult because you may be risking your friendship with him if you approach the subject, and he doesn’t feel the love you suspected. Don’t worry; in this article, we will look at this from all angles so that you know what you are facing!

Signs That Your Best Friend Is In Love with You

1. He has become overly affectionate

Has your best friend started touching you more lately? Has the touching been ever so subtle but enough that you’ve noticed? These are definite signs that he is ready to move the relationship to the next level. His body language and the way he treats you can give all of this away. Just watch for the signs that he’s excited to be around you.

2. He acts annoyed or jealous when you talk about other guys

Ugh! There’s nothing worse than hearing your crush talk about other guys or gals. You want them to just pay attention to you, but instead, they are blabbing on and on about the opposite sex. If your friend acts annoyed that you talk about other guys, it may be a sign that he is sick of the topic and wants you all to himself!

3. He posts pictures of the two of you on social media

Of course, every group of best friends posts pictures of themselves on social media. However, have you noticed that he always wants to take selfies with you? He wants to show the world that you are with each other all the time! That’s kind of sweet. If you think that he could be more than a friend, you should make a move and give him a kiss!

4. He tries to spend as much time as possible with you 

How to know if a friend loves you

You’re thinking, “Of course, he wants to hang out with me all the time; I’m fabulous!” But, think about it, realistically. Does he seem to always want to hang out - not because he’s lonely or doesn’t have a connection with other friends like he does with you? What I’m saying is, “Does he want to hang out with you because he really has a thing for you?”

5. He is a really good listener

Have you noticed your friend pays close attention to every word you have to say? Of course, ideally, we’d all like our friends to be excellent listeners, but there’s a difference between a good listener and a listener who gives you their undivided attention. Does he hang on your words, remembering something you said a long time ago?

6. He asks about your love life

When you have it bad for someone, you want to know who they are dating, who they like, and who they are head over heels for, right? You don’t want any competition! He probably wants to know if you are more than friends with any other guy right now or if he has a good chance of winning you over for good. If you feel the same, let him know!

7. He jokes about how he should be your boyfriend

I’ve had many male friends who were curious about my love life but who also joked around about being the only man in my life. I later found out that was their way of hitting on me; they were trying to get a feel for my interest in them. They wanted something more than friendship with me. I should have guessed as much, but I misread the signs.

8. He gets defensive and jealous when other guys are around

There’s a good chance that your best friend doesn’t like it when other guys come around and compete for your attention. It’s one of those things that you can’t help, especially if you never knew they were interested in being more than just friends. 

Do you feel like he kind of takes you for granted? Unfortunately this is one of the most frequent complaints we get from our readers, where they feel they aren't a priority for their boyfriend or husband. They always seem to have some excuse as to why they can't spend some quality time with you like they used to.

Due to popular demand, our friend prepared a quick video (click to watch) that'll show you to one easy but often overlooked thing that you can say to him today that'll help him realize how lucky he is to have you (hint: it's something that taps into how men are wired).

If there is something there with your guy, there’s a good chance he’ll get jealous every now and then.

9. He stares at you

You may catch him staring at you when you least expect it. Have you ever spent time with your best friend and noticed him looking in your general direction or something? Maybe you were watching a movie together, and you caught him staring at your hair, or maybe you went to a school event, and he looked more at you than at the cheerleaders!

10. He texts you or messages you on social media all the time

There’s a chance when you’re best friends with a guy that he’ll want to keep in touch with you even when you aren’t spending time with each other. You may be thinking, “When does that ever happen?” Give him a break! He misses you when you aren’t together! However, if you just want to be friends, give him some space when he texts.

11. He’s very talkative

Does your best friend ask you a million questions? He is trying to get to know you better. He may feel that by learning more about you, he’ll be less fascinated, but that rarely happens, right? In fact, usually, it works the opposite way. The more he learns about you, the more fascinated he is with you and the person you are growing to be.

12. He is not dating anyone else

How to know if a friend loves you

Of course, he may just not be interested in anyone else, but if the whole time you’ve known him, he hasn’t had a date, that could be a sign that he’s interested in only you. You could be the only thing on his mind, and he isn’t interested in looking at another person. Did he go on lots of dates before you were best friends? Watch this one!

13. He fixes himself up for you

Does he always have cologne on or that sweater you bought him for his birthday? He may be preening for you. Preening, according to the Urban Dictionary, is the act of trying to make yourself look better for the opposite sex. It’s a relatively new term that basically refers to fixing yourself up so that you appear hotter to guys or gals. 

14. He tries to spend a lot of alone time with you

A best friend does what he can to spend time with his other half, but a best friend in love will enjoy alone time with you, exchanging sweet eye contact with each other as he hopes that romance is brewing in the air. You may notice him doing things like this as your relationship progresses. 

See what happens when you take some time away from him. He might go bananas from withdrawal. He needs to see you - his favorite best friend on a regular basis.

15. He always is available to hang out with you

He may be a busy person, but does he always make time for you? Of course, people with best friends do make time for each other, but you may find that he drops everything for you and you alone. This is a special kind of treatment, and you can bet your best friend likes you more than just a friend. He wants there to be kissing in the tree! Shh!

16. He gives you compliments all the time

Your best friend loves the way you dress; your friend loves the way you talk; he shows you the signs that he truly has a thing for you. Sometimes, you may not think twice about these things because it’s so nice to get compliments about something from someone. However, if he always fills you up with beautiful words, there may be something there.

17. He tries to befriend your friends

He wants your friends to put in a good word for him. Think about it. If your best girlfriend loves him, she’ll probably talk him up. She may ask you why the two of you haven’t hooked up yet. So, once he gets to know all of your girlfriends, be prepared for that question. Think about how you feel ahead of time so that you can answer her!

18. He jokes about not being stuck in the friend zone

How to know if a friend loves you

Sometimes, we joke around about things that are on our minds. He may start to wonder if he really is in the friend zone or if he’s safely out of there and ready to be a boyfriend or at least a date in the near future. It may make you wonder what the answer to that question would be from you! That’s another question you might want to think about!

19. His body language gives it away

Have you noticed him giving you a lot of eye contact? If your best friend loves you, he may not be able to help some of the signs he gives off from body language. See if he has signs of nervousness or awkwardness, like blushing, sweating, or even licking the lips. As weird as they sound, those are symptoms of being nervous!

20. He gets uncomfortable talking about sex

As his nervous nature grows around you, you may notice him getting uncomfortable when something that has to do with sex comes on the television you are watching together. If he used to be cool about the subject but now seems weirded out about it, that may be a sign he’s thinking about having sex with you!

21. He gets your family to fall in love with him

Just like your girlfriends, this smart guy knows if he can get your family to fall in love with him, he’s a shoo-in. He just has to get under their radar “as a friend,” not as a potential boyfriend who will corrupt their poor daughter. Once he’s invited to family dinners, that’s just more time that he gets to spend with you! This sneaky friend knows what he’s doing.

22. He holds your hand

While it’s true that many friends hold hands, it’s not something you see every day, and it could definitely mean that he has deep feelings for you. Did he initiate the physical contact, or is this something that just “happened?” It may have been polite at first, but if it’s a given way you interact now, he probably likes you as more than a best friend.

23. He always wants to help you out

I love this trait in guys; they always want to be the big helper - whether they like you or not. So, how can you tell what their true feelings are for you? Well, watch for the other signs he shows that indicate he wants to be more than friends with you. He wants you to be “his person.” Do you want to be his person, or stay pals from now on?

24. He tries to make you jealous

Does he talk obnoxiously about other girls or dates he has to go on? He may really have strong feelings for you but want you to like him as much as he likes you. You may have to decide if he’s trying to make you jealous or if he’s really some kind of player who likes toying with women. Of course, you don’t want to be with a player!

25. He asks you to hang out at unusual times

How to know if a friend loves you

So you normally hang out after class and do your homework together, right? If he starts asking you to go jogging Sunday mornings, that might be a little weird. Well, it may indicate he has feelings for you that go beyond friendship. See if he asks you to hang out more times than is usual for a friend. It may mean he’s ready to take things deeper.

26. He makes a marriage arrangement with you

You know that marriage agreement that goes something like, “If we are both single when we reach the age of 35, we marry each other, no questions asked?” Those cute words may mean his feelings for you are greater than just a friendship. He wants to see how you respond to a fake marriage proposal before asking you out for real

When a guy tries to physically get closer to the girl he likes, it often means he has a crush on her. You may have noticed him moving your purse or even the remote control to try to prevent any obstacles from being in between you two. If you have noticed him inching closer, it could mean he has feelings of love for you. 

28. He remembers the little things

Have you ever noticed when you like someone, you tend to remember all the details in their stories or discussions? You might even say something bizarre like, “Last week, when you said you like to pick up trash under the stadium rather than look at the cheerleaders, I remember you were wearing blue.” Weird thing to say, right?

Does your best friend remember little details like that? Does he remind you of things you said a long time ago, things no one would normally remember?

29. He is very flirtatious around you

Okay, so he may not twirl his hair when he talks, but there are other signs of flirtation that guys can show. He may lightly touch you on the arm or shoulder when you talk. He may tell jokes or say funny things that he knows will make you smile or laugh - just because he wants to see your reaction! Watch closely to see what he does!

What To Do If You Also Love Him

How to know if a friend loves you

Before you take action on the information you have discovered about him, you need to assess your own feelings. Are you certain that he is in love with you? Do you think your friend is ready to admit to his feelings for you? How do you feel about him? If you think you love him as well, there is a chance for a match made in heaven. You just need to find the right moment to talk.

If you feel the same about your best friend, you should approach him and discuss the matter. Find a time when you are both free and can openly talk about the way you feel. Something like this needs to be given the right time to talk it out. You need to find a moment when you won’t be distracted by work or social media. Your friend deserves your undivided attention.

You want him to be comfortable when you talk so that he can open up the way he needs to. It’s important to leave the lines of communication open. You want your friend to know that he can openly talk about his feelings for you, and you won’t judge him or make fun of what he has to say. When you spend time together, you should let him know how you feel about him.

Do You Really Feel The Same Way About Him?

Love is like a rollercoaster; it makes us feel up one day and down the next. We often don’t know what causes that, but it’s fun to just go for the ride. Do you feel overwhelmed when you see him? Does your stomach feel like it’s in knots, or there are butterflies floating around in there? Another common sensation with love is the feeling of floating. Have you felt that way around him?

It can be fun to feel excitement and passion! There are also times when it can all be overwhelming. This is because love is often an all-or-nothing feeling. You are either in the game, or you are sitting on the sidelines, watching everyone else feel so romantic. 

Decide your feelings before approaching your best friend. If you’re unsure, you may want to stay friends for the time being. After all, falling in love with your best friend is a huge deal, and you don’t want to blow it. If this person is your best friend, check your feelings before moving on!

What To Do If You Only Want Friendship

If you only want to be friends with your best friend but suspect he’s in love with you, you should back off. Take some time for yourself and some time away from your friend. You need some space to think things over. If you feel like your friendship is strong enough to stand this, you should talk it over with your best friend. Let him know that you think he’s in love with you.

Explain that you really just want to be friends and nothing more. Tell him that things will not change over time. If he’s the type of person with a high level of emotional intelligence, he will understand what you are saying, and he will swallow his pride and stop the flirtation and touching (or whatever sign he was giving you that you noticed and told you he was in love).

Make sure you are gentle when you tell him these things. Often, friends can communicate about something like this easily, especially if they read each other well. Your friend loves you; you probably love him, too; you just love him in a different way. That’s okay; you just need to be honest so that you are not leading him on a path where there is no hope.

How To Move Out Of The Friendzone

How to know if a friend loves you

If you have a friend who is in love with you, and you feel the same way, it may be time to take action. You know your friend loves you, but how can you best show him you are ready to move out of the friend zone? One thing you can do is start fixing yourself up; I mean, look like a hottie from top to bottom; dress as if you were going on a super hot date. 

You should put on that uncomfortable but super hot red dress with those very high red heels. He’ll get the hint and ask you out, or take matters into your own hands and ask him out!

FAQs

How do you know if your best friend is in love with you?

You can look for the signs that your best friend is in love with you, which are listed in this article. One thing that could be a sign is if he gets jealous every time you talk to other guys. He may want to spend every second with you.

Is it good to fall in love with your best friend?

I think that’s the best way to start out your love life. You want your lover to be your best friend, right? There’s a good chance that love will grow into a marriage one day. You just have to have the right romantic feelings for one another.

Can a friendship turn into love?

Friends can definitely fall in love with each other. I know a girl who married her best friend, and they are happier now than I’ve ever seen it. Many successful marriages start out as friendships and later find that they have romantic feelings for each other. 

Do Best Friends cuddle?

Definitely! Best friends are comfortable and want to spend lots of time together. If your best friend likes to snuggle up by the fire, why not enjoy his company? Just be careful that he doesn’t get the wrong idea and want more than just cuddling when you aren’t ready!

Is it normal to kiss your best friend?

If you feel like your time together has warranted a kiss, then it’s perfectly fine to kiss your best friend. Friends kiss each other all the time. Making out or french kissing is another story altogether, though. You may want to save those things for the romance department.

To Sum Things Up…

Do you think your best friend is in love with you? Pay attention to the little signs mentioned in this article to know for sure if he is or not. What are your thoughts on the subject? I’d love to hear from you in the comments section below! Please share!

Does it feel like pulling teeth getting him to say how he feels about you? Some men can be very gaurded and closed when it comes to expressing how they feel - it can almost feel like they are pulling away from you. Many women make the mistake of pushing their man to say how they feel, but this is actually one of the worst things you can do as it can push him away further.

To get him to really show you how he feels and communicate how much he appreciates you, there's one simple thing, although often overlooked, thing you can say to him today that taps into how men are wired and can often lead to them suddenly pouring their heart out. My friend recorded a quick free video (click to watch) that shows exactly how to do that.

How to know if a friend loves you

Michelle Devani

My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.